World of Suck

Push. PushPushPushPush. Push.

Seems kinky huh? But not really. I'm describing someone (me) trying to get something (soap) out of dispenser (in the bathroom). And why precisely was I jamming on the button with such enthusiasm? Well because I wanted soap, naturally.

My reward? One tiny, microscopic dot of soap.

From the other dispenser? None at all.

I wonder if I can eat my lunch with gloves on...

Well there's a reason for those silly warning stickers. But apparently it doesn't deter some people from hurting themselves anyway. And, of course, when it happens? Well they're gonna sue, sue, sue!

SANTA ANA, Calif. (AP) -- A California jury says Yamaha Motor Corp. USA is not liable for injuries a man suffered when he crashed in one of the company's off-road vehicles.

The case was the first to go to trial among more than 170 lawsuits filed in California over the company's Rhino brand of vehicles. The cases are all being heard in Orange County Superior Court.

The plaintiff, Richard Holt, argued that defects in his 2005 Rhino 660 caused it to roll, fracturing two bones in his left leg.

Of course this guy lost, lost, lost but keep in mind - only the plaintiff lost, not his lawyer. Would you believe there are specialty lawyers (or insert your noun of choice) whose main business is ATV lawsuits? Of course you do, but you could go to atvlawsuits.com and see for yourself (no gratuitious link provided there because if you don't believe me you can copy/paste or type it, fuck if I'm gonna be a direct referrer.)

Better yet! if you take that URL and add "/rhino" they'll tell you to call them about Rhino rollovers! But wait there's more - on the same page they will also show you the warning sticker Yamaha puts on their vehicle warning people not to drive like dickheads because their ride just MIGHT tip over... Props for being thorough guys. But I guess it works since several hundred more yahoos have signed up to try and take on Yamaha.

Cypress, Calif.-based Yamaha faces about 400 other lawsuits over the Rhino in federal and state courts in Kentucky and Georgia.

I dunno, frankly I don't think it matters how many people are lined up to take their shot at Yamaha, the only winners are going to be the lawyers. After all the warning label right ON the vehicle is pretty clear, even if you can't read real well.

Not when it comes to cranky cats and cat carriers in my book. Let this be a lesson to those who don't agree...

BANKS, Ore. (AP) -- Oregon State Police have taken the unusual step of issuing a missing cat alert for a feline that caused a car crash, escaped from a smashed SUV and vanished. Southern Oregon University student Brittany Spady rolled her Ford Explorer on U.S. 26 east of Banks on Monday night after her long-haired tortoiseshell cat Calysta crawled between the brake and gas pedals. Spady said she took her eyes off the road to try and stop the cat.

She said the cat refuses to travel in a carrier.

So here's the deal. Take the carrier out a day earlier and leave it open. Eventually cat will come out of hiding, at least for food.

When cat does appear, make nice-nice until you can get close enough to pet it. Treats help. Reach for scruff, lift and drop into carrier.

Slam door and away you go. It also helps to upend the carrier so the cat needs a second or two to orient itself. That gives you time to close the door if you don't have a friend handy to help out.

D-day is approaching. Mexican government officials have setup thousands of Govt. officials on the border to insure that those fleeing out of Arizona can make passage easily and safely back into the motherland without being harassed by the "fascist regime" in Arizona. The US government is ramping up it's security along the border to ensure peace and quiet as D-day approaches. Human rights groups are out in full force observing the happenings. The worldwide media has its eyes peering upon them. Other US States are beginning to adopt similar legislation. Congressional representatives speech writers are busy writing several variations of speeches to be spoken to the mass media that can apply to either way the Judge decides on SB1070. Law enforcement is busy training their troops how to properly enforce the law. Anti-SB1070 groups are busy figuring out how to entrap law enforcement into making mistakes on enforcing this bill. The Spin Doctors are busy flooding the public with misinformation and deception. People are arguing in forums about how bad this new bill is or isn't. Millions are forming their own opinions, even arguing over the Constitutionality. Everyone in the media and political arenas anxiously await the outcome.

My question is where have all these people been over the past 30+ years? Why hasn't anyone raised this much hell over the Federal version of SB1070 that was last visited in congress decades ago? Is it just because it's not been actively enforced? Is it because nobody knew the Federal version existed? Is it because our elected officials fear the Latino voter outcry if this Federal Law were to be enforced?

Regardless of the fate of SB1070 this entire situation is a good thing. It has opened the Country's eyes to the problems with our Immigration system and hopefully paves the way for our Government to fix the problems at hand. Not everyone is going to be happy with whatever is put in place to fix the problem. You can't make 100% of the people happy on either side. Let's see if our elected officials have the balls to fix what's broken instead of putting their tails between their legs.

I only wish this much emphasis, Media coverage and public involvement was present more often in our Society. It might prevent a lot of the crooked politics that have overtaken our Federal, City and State Governments.

Ha, I love stories like this. If you hadn't heard the main story it revolved around unusually high pay rates for the top brass in this little city of less than 40,000 residents in Cali. The City Manager had an annual salary of over $700,000, The asst. manager, $300,000 and the Chief of Police at $450,000. This is a 'charter' city so it didn't fall into the usual and customary scrutiny of other Cities. Recently people found out how much these tools were making on THEIR tax dollars and they revolted thereby forcing them out of office, and of course onto their pensions, which are 75% of what they were making anyhow, so no real savings by removing them. The median income is just over $39,000.00/yr in this little city so the top brass's numbers certainly seem out of line and probably more in line with some 'richer' city such as Beverly Hills.

Sadly, these people whom are now revolting are the same people who voted for these continued pay-raises for their city officials. Yup. All these pay raises were balloted and approved by the residents of the community, nothing was under the table, all above board.

Hey Bell City California people.. guess what? You have to pay attention to what you vote for.. duh?

Ahhh.. Senator Kerry from the great state of Masshole. Tsk Tsk Tsk. You have been preaching for years about buying everything made in the USA. Unfortunately for you, over the past decade there are hours of video of you preaching to the masses about how important it is to keep American workers working. How important it is to make sure you buy American products at all costs. Now it seems you've found yourself in a pickle over your new Boat. Wait.. it's not boat, it's a yacht. Well, whatever you call it it appears that it's not American Made. Nope, plenty of yacht builders right here in the USA but you bought it from a custom builder in New Zealand. 7 mil for a boat? Congratulations.. I'm sure the US economy certainly would have appreciated it.

Now, if I were your adviser I would have suggested purchasing this boat here in the US and making a media spectacle of this situation. Let me lay this out for you....You wanted a new boat, you know that Americans need the work. I would have had a press release about helping American workers by purchasing my 7 million dollar boat right here in the great US of A. People in your state would have been proud of you, the media would have complimented you. Your credibility would have increased dozens of points. But instead you chose to purchase off-shore because it was 'less expensive' and then attempt to skirt the system by docking it in Rhode Island where you wont have to pay the excise taxes? tsk tsk tsk. Silly John... you silly thing you!

Please don't try to dock it in Rhode Island to avoid your $700,000 one-time luxury tax and $70,000 yearly excise tax that YOUR State has enacted. Those poor people in your State need those tax dollars and you shouldn't avoid them! Shame on you. Perhaps now you'll see why everyone else purchases off-shore too - and while you're at it, work on those trade deficits with China for us too.

Do you and Charlie Rangel use the same accountant?

Jennifer Keeton is pursuing a master's degree in Georgia State's Counselor Education Program. She has had multiple incidents where she has expressed her beliefs that homosexuality and sexual identity that differs from one's chromosomes are lifestyle choices. She even classifies gays as suffering from "gender confusion". Since the facility is concerned about her stance on these issues they want her to have "diversity sensitivity training" or be expelled. She is
suing the University for discriminating against her Christian views

On one hand, we have the constitutional right to believe what ever we want. If the purpose of the "diversity sensitivity training" is to change her core belief it is not only unconstitutional but it is likely destined to fail considering her strong convictions. However, on the other hand, if she will ultimately seek employment in a public school (which is possible), she may behave in a way that is unconstitutional toward those she counsels. The last thing a counselor should be doing is telling someone she is assigned to help, particularly a young person who is exploring their sexual orientation, "You need to turn away from your morally depraved ways".

Fact is, if you want your views valued and respected you need to respect the views of others. Unfortunately those with opinions at polar ends of the spectrum have a hard time respecting those that do not at least partially share those opinions. If Miss Keeton doesn't get that her beliefs are irrelevant to the problems of someone else, then she should be expelled. She should have failed a few classes, too (which there is some indication that her writing skills need some improvement). She seems to have missed the point that counselors are supposed to counsel not judge. If she has a problem with that then she is pursuing the wrong degree and maybe she should consider changing majors to theology. Staff of the University of Georgia has a right to be concerned whether Miss Keeton can serve all people regardless of sexual orientation without bias.

Those like Miss Keeton are bringing the 1st Amendment into a "Catch 22" situation. The government cannot interfere with an individual's right to worship or believe. Individuals cannot be discriminated against due to their religious beliefs. However, our institutions are made up of individuals, all with their own views and opinions. So what happens when an individual's religious beliefs are in conflict with what are considered standards held by individuals already practicing that profession? What happens when an individual in a position of authority (or may be aspiring to such a position) wants to impose those views on someone vulnerable to them (for example, a student being counseled at school)?

If she wins this round it is likely one round of many court battles for Miss Keeton. The first now to get her degree. Then when no school will hire her, she sue for discrimination again. Then once she brow beats someone into hiring her, the parents of a gay or lesbian student will haul her ass into court. Yup, square peg, meet round hole. Get hammer of the law and smack really, really hard till something gives.

I hate that people give one stinking phone number connected to voicemail. I hate that you're supposed to leave a message and not know whether the person has fallen off the face of the earth or is just away from their desk. I hate that there is no receptionist/secretary to hunt that person down when you get a message late for a conference call. I hate that I missed the conference call because the only number I got was connected to voicemail. I just plain hate fucking voicemail. Only thing I hate more is endless prompts at "customer service" telephone lines - but that is an entirely different issue.

Just because someone is a highly paid lecturer doesn't mean they're not a fucking asshole, or even worth listening to.

That is all.

It's just gross, and I can't decide if it's just a nasty habit making a comeback or I've just encountered a lot of uncouth people in the recent days. The last example, yesterday, kept leaning out his car window and gobbing out one wad after another like a human paintball gun. And due to the fact that we were wedged in an hour-long traffic jam at 7am I was treated to this charming view over and over and over. After the Nth time I wanted to yell out "Enough already Asshole!"

It's more than gross, it's just unhealthy for the rest of us. I mean what if he had Herpes and some innocent baby goes by in the backseat with the window open? Extreme but not improbable. So really, if you have to dispose of your lugie, do it privately, or at least not repetitively. For the rest of us.

Or next time I may just figure out how to spew one into your open window. While driving. I'll consider it a challenge.

Yes they're back. Like two saggy bags of pizza dough on top of chopsticks pipe-stem (aka ultra-straight-leg) jeans are back. They looked crappy before and, surprisingly enough, look just as unflattering now.

The backlash was about a decade of baggy-butt jeans that culminated in drooping-crack-revealing denim designs. Other than being a boon for the underwear manufacturers who were suddenly vaulted into unusual exposure (thus the miraculous materialization of colors and patterns) there's little to be happy about. In fact there's much to be depressed about: most women will hate the way their jeans fit, and most men will be stuck having to lie about how they think they fit.

Fashion 1: The Rest of Us -1

It was 2am and the last few hours had been lost in the cold, tacky and cheerless safety of the porcelain god. Food poisoning, truly an experience in misery, where choices in self-medication are limited to That Which May Be Found Within Bolting Distance. And I knew that somewhere in the house was a container of pepto-type medication. Desperate, after several hours of throwing up and sitting down, I combed the cabinets. The heavens opened and I was bathed in golden rays of hope when I wrapped my shivering fingers around the bottle.

What I didn't realize was how old it was. Or rather, I didn't, until after I'd quaffed dose 1 of 2.

Even in my weakened state I was still forced to pause and give thought to this. After all the expiration date on the back said "2000".

What the hell. I decided to down the second dose and take my chances, after all any worse off than I currently was would probably equate to immediate intervention or unconsciousness. Both of which could be dramatic improvements over the current state of misery.

Needless, I survived, none the worse for wear, at least as far as I can tell. Nonetheless I did go out and buy a new bottle. After all there was a 33% chance I'd get worse as opposed to a 66% that I'd get better or at least stay the same. Certainly doesn't hurt, at least not as badly as I did...

Clearly in the category "Waaaaaaaaah!" is this little tidbit:

New VAIO goes through the typical masturbation ritual of updating everything in the world when it's first powered on. Sure, ok, whatever. Windows is out in front, installing over 32k separate gidgets. Then, not to be left behind (after all it's their computer) VAIO Update jumps into the fray.

"Oh please Kind Sir would you install MY updates as well?"

Sure kid, whatever, quit snivelling, you're getting on my nerves.

Once you agree however, and get past the welcome message, it won't actually LET you install the update unless it's plugged in. Uh what? Battery is fully charged, they should be able to sense it (I mean fuck, it's being displayed) do they REALLY believe it would take longer than the full battery life to install an update to their update program? (VAIO Update cannot continue until it installs VAIO Update.)

Sigh. Such are the joys of owning a new computer. Now I'm busy trying to find the app that's randomly sticking RSS news feeds at the top of my screen and then winking them away as I try and click. Evil, just evil.

I had a broken motherboard. Found out it was under warranty. The manufacturer, EVGA, was more than happy to offer a replacement, even though it was 4 yrs old. Unfortunately, the replacement would not work with my existing processor and memory. So I had make a choice. See if a compatible MoBo was available or get a new processor and memory.

I found a potential MoBo replacement that could use my processor for $60, but the manufacturer and supplier is someone I am unfamiliar with (in other words, might be a piece of crap). The new processor plus new memory and related stuff will cost about $175 from Newegg (good manufacturers and reliable supplier). Decided to upgrade my computer. Perhaps not the upgrade I envisioned in a year, but an upgrade all the same.

I package up my old MoBo and went to UPS. (That was a story in it's own right. One about rude counter staff - and staff that know when to send said rude staff to the back room.) I forked over $15 for shipping. Then waited. Got word that they would honor the RMA and gave me my choices. I chose one of the boards offered and waited some more. Finally got curious when I didn't get an e-mail, so I logged into EVGA's website and found it was on it's way and will be delivered on Friday.

On the allotted day, I left a note on the door with specific instructions on where the package can be left safely and signed it. I get home to find the typical UPS sticky with "IN PERSON" written. I fume and dial the phone. UPS will not back down and leave the package on Monday because it is the shippers instructions. UPS wants to charge me $6 to change the delivery address. EVGA won't back down because it's "policy" because people don't typically want "$500 video cards left on their doorstep". Huh? I explain that I could have bought another MoBo for under $100 and that I have had $500 of merchandise left here so their policy is irrelevant to me. I also explain that if they had told me the situation up front I would have offered an alternate address.

I finally decide to just go to UPS and pick-up the package Monday. The only good thing is that UPS actually has "working people" hours now and they are open until 9 pm - so no jetting from work like a mad women to make it before the door closes (been there done, that, not fun)

Finally tally:

$15 shipping + $175 in supplies + lots of grief + lots of waiting = slightly improved computer.

vs.

$60 for MoBo from untried but probably OK source + less waiting and hassle = basically the same computer I would have upgraded next year.

Hmm, in hind sight it is a tough call.

Lesson learned - Ask the SoBs how they are shipping the item and adjust accordingly.

Timothy and Rebecca Wyland had a 7 month old baby, Alayna. The only good news is that the State of Oregon has her now. You see, Alayna, had a growth on her head, just above her left eye. It started out small, but grew to the size of a tennis ball. It was bright red, and oozed yellow puss.

Now, I don't know about but that sort of thing would be immediate trip to whatever doctor I could get to. But since you're reading it here, clearly Tim and Rebecca aren't that sort of parent. Instead of seeking treatment, they prayed. And every day, Rebecca wiped the puss away, and anointed the child with oil. Isn't that special? They never even considered seeking medical assistance. They're members of a batshit crazy religious group called the Follower's of Christ that believes in faith healing, laying on hands, and similar dogmatic bullshit.

But someone else must have. They phone the state social workers who took the child away to get treated. Turns out that the condition is called hemangioma. It's a fast growing mass of blood vessels that "eventually caused her eye to shut, pushed the eyeball down and outward, and affected the eye socket". It's apparently reasonably easy to treat if discovered early. It's uncertain if the vision in her eye can be restored, and it's certain that she will need additional surgery.

The court asked the parents when they would have sought care for their child. The father's answer was that he puts his faith in God. If his daughter did not improve, "that's his will,"

It's fucking sick. These parents are too fucking stupid to be trusted with a hampster, let alone a human baby. They actually have the gall to demand their child back from foster care too. Honestly, I can't begin to describe how sick and twisted I think these two people are.

Fuck them. Google them. Look a the picture of that baby's eye.

Fuck you Rebecca Wyland. You're an unfit mother. Nothing but a birth canal without the decency of a dog. At least the bitch will actually try to protect it's litter. You gave up and abandoned your child at the very first hurdle in it's life.

Fuck you Timothy Wyland. You're a wretch. A man stands up and protects his family. He doesn't lay down and accept what comes. He fights to get the best he can for them. But like your wife, you similarly surrendered.

Fuck you both. You're bad parents. You're dangerous, and you don't deserve to ever see your progeny again. You're horrible people. Wretches. Reprobates.

In the most absolute terms... fuck you. I hope you die screaming.

Vacation Day, Part Deux: Act 1, Scene 1 - road side lobster shack, diners seated outside on wooden picnic tables with colored umbrellas and clear plastic squeeze bottles of ketchup. Delicious smells waft from the stainless steel kitchen, all sorts of seafood delicacies are soon to be delivered to the hungry patrons on bright colored plastic trays.

I'm watching and waiting for our food, starved more from the tantalizing scents than from the fact that it's dinner time and I haven't really had lunch. Kids are cavorting in the reedy grass to one side of the parkinglot/picnic table area. One towheaded little boy stand beside the remnants of a dock post, holding an empty paper cup. He tries to balance the cup on the post, and little Newton is hardly surprised when it falls off and rolls away. The white paper is a blot on the rich green. I rather expect that he'll go pick it up, instead he waits patiently until his mom sees him and then he points to the cup.

"Pick it up dear, you don't want to litter."

Good, that's what I expected, but the kid doesn't. He deliberately saunters away with glances as his parent.

Let's pause here. Had Brat been mine I would have upped the ante with a glare and reminder that orders are to be carried out. If he didn't I would have hauled his ass over to the cup and made him pick it up. Resistance would have been met with a swift whack. I do not tolerate in-your-face disobedience. If the kid was distracted, OK that's one thing. I'd pick up the cup and then remind him later that it's important to respect nature and other people's property. Return to scene...

Mom, likely some rich-twat, does neither. She glances over, sees the cup, but can't be bothered. She gathers up her bag, the other kids, and calls to her brat to follow. I want to smack her. Clearly she's not going to clean up after her child, she's much too important to dirty her expensive shoes on the grass.

I hate with a passion people like this. Last time it happened in front of me I picked up the trash and handed it back to them with a friendly "here you forgot this." The person has a conniption of course, because I had caught them AND called them out. "THERE WASN'T ANY GARBAGE CAN!" The woman had screamed at me.

But about then my dinner came, and a valid distraction prevailed. I hope Brat acts the same at home, but I suspect that Mom probably doesn't deal with it then either. I'd wager that it falls to some poor cleaning lady to resolve. Yah, Brat is going to be a great adult, the type that stubs his butts out on the beach sand and leaves them there for everyone else to see. Ugh.

I don't know what to call them, insecure? Desperate for attention? Just plain assholes who want to annoy you? They're the people who, when there's miles and miles of open sand to choose from, come and set up their camp less than two feet away.

It's about 4pm on a windy, overcast day. A few strong souls are hopping in and out of the surf for the fun of it, the rest are just hugging the still-warm sand and enjoying the peace and relaxation. While most are getting ready, somewhat reluctantly, to pack it in, there are a few newcomers trickling in.

I'm a beach snoozer. With all good intentions I bring books and a ball, maybe even some work with me but inevitably I just wind up dozing to the rhythmic crash of the surf. And that's where I was when Emilio (don't know his real name, but this will do) showed up. Dragging his heavily laden beach chair he dumped it down about three feet away.

Frowning I looked up at my companion. They frowned back. We both looked over pointedly. A quick scan to the right and left confirmed that, indeed, there was at least thirty feet of unblemished, unoccupied sand to either side of us.

Apparently pleased with the fact that he had our attention, "Emilio" proceeds to take off his shirt and then unpack his beach umbrella. With the generous moves of a conductor climaxing Wagner's Ring Cycle, he starts to embed the spear-ended section of the umbrella. A repressed exhibitionist I'm guessing, but his methods are somewhat lacking in their entertainment value.

Did I neglect to mention that it was overcast?

I put my head back down, a clear message of "I'm ignoring you." Emilio seems depressed, his umbrella languishes, unopened, like a guard at Buckingham Palace. He struts about a bit more... until his companion shows up. "I'm going in the water," he says brusquely, and then meanders off. She huddles under her towels in her matching beach chair in response. Yep, clearly one passionate romance going on there.

We took our time, I finished my dozing, my friend their book, refusing to be perturbed by the asshole nearby. Sometimes the key to retaining your sanity is having the ability to just shrug and tune out the rest of the world. I wish they gave recognition for that, because no question, I'd be a four-star champion at it.